Just a thought on time

It's utterly unpleasurable when someone close to us, especially in our space of passion, i.e. - music, passes away. Yesterday the world lost J. Dran Lewis, the founder and creator of Warrior Instruments. More than just my luthier, my friend and someone close like family to me, and a person who helped me shorten the gap between myself and my faith, we all falter sometimes, and other times, it's an unexpected person who enters your life to make a difference.

Very few people here talk with me at all, or share music, whatever - you do you, I do me, it's just music, I'm not here for brotherhood, I like the site and I support Dick's vision. But I was thinking today - we all had some sort of goal once: touring, make an album, work with an artist, something we thought we would do in music, and maybe never quite achieved.

I've been extremely lucky. I've played with most everyone I'd hoped to, toured to many of the places I hoped to and met some wonderful people along the way - including a couple here on Wikiloops who helped me accomplish things I'd had on my back burner, but the years pass fast, and there's so much more I wish I'd been able to do, but at 55 in just a couple short months, I just ain't that kid they look for anymore.

How about you? Did you have goals that didn't come to fruition? Hopes that are more a dream now than the potential you thought some years back you might get to? Have you settled? Hit a wall and just stopped with a dream?

Music is a fickle bitch, and she plays with your heart and your desire, often pulling you away from that one thing because as an artist, you need to keep creating and you saw another thing, so back burner with the first, and so on.

Anyone? Did you have some hopes that didn't pan out? Goals that just fell so far behind there's no getting back to them? Things you know you're damned well capable of but simply won't happen because as we all know, time is short and even the strongest efforts can only scale a wall so high.

Just a thought, figured I'd write it out and see if anyone actually converses on wikiloops.

Best,

Joe

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Written from the heart and I think quite a few people share your sentiments.

Personally I wouldn`t accept the age argument. You can still have (new) dreams and ambitions at 55 (or 60 in my case) and they wouldn`t be the same as the dreams you had at 20 as you`re now a different person with knowledge and experience you didn`t have before.

Plus, some dreams are tied to times past, when we had a record industry and had people who listened to music instead of just consuming it.

So the framework is different now, but does that prohibit dreams and ambitions?

I would think that all the necessary components needed to make musical dreams come true still exist. WL is a good illustration that capable musicians are willing to play. Yes, it is mostly "you do you, I do me" but that`s just the way we use the platform to input our stuff. But the potential to move the input to output outside of the WL bubble is there for all to use. It just takes additional effort and ideas but that`s not a reason for dreams to die.

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Hey Joe, sorry to hear about your loss. I get where you come from, I am a little bit older than you and as I am entering the "old person" stage of my life, for sure I tend to think about what ifs.

When I was a teenager I met a guy and we hit it off immediately, playing guitar - I instantly liked him because he knew how to play the solo of Sabo Day by Peter Green. This was pre-Facebook times, so after a while we lost contact, but reconnected after a few years - turns out he was a founding member of a famous rock band.

He lived the up and downs of a rock star life, then the band splits, years of financial difficulties, then reforming of the band, and now rock royalty, life is good for him.

And I always tells him, whenever we meet up once in a while, that he is my hero, because I just did not have the b**** to do what he did. I don't like the unknown. I don't like to have to worry about how to pay the bills tomorrow. I would have struggled to have to work in odd jobs just to earn a few bucks. I did the boring family/kids/house/car/work work work thing. Quite successfully but not very artistic to be honest.

AND: I probably did not have the talent for it like he did. But occasionally I have the thought flickering in my mind, what if?

I always wanted to make an Album of original music, and with the help of this great site and some great band members I managed to do that, the two Albums of the Herring King Band are my pride and joy, especially the second one https://www.wikiloops.com/album/21230-The+Herring+King+Band+-+Second+Album+

My one musical dream is to make an Herring King Band album with my old friend, however it's difficult as he is busy busy busy and also lives in another country, but I am working on it. I am working on it though :D

Peace and love y'all!

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Hey Joe,
I have read and re-read your initial post, had a short moment of wondering whether I really get what you are asking for here, as there is a mix of topics addressed. Hoping to reply in a way that resonates, here I go...

First, my condolences on the loss of a close friend.
Being a decade younger than you are, this has not happened to me as often, or with as-close people, but it has happened, and I know how it lets one think about the limited time we have to live our dreams or achieve our goals, or do the mistery things we somehow do without having planned or dreamed of them - like having an impact on someone we met unexpectedly, as you and your friend did.

Reading your post, I felt like: Is he asking about musical goals, or life goals here - or are we talking about that inevitable realization of "I'm getting older, and I should realize my chances of reaching goals or experiencing the dreamt-of-things are not improving", which is a bit different?

Not being as much of a "hot pick" in peoples eyes once you have a certain age is real, be it on the partnership market, the job market or when they cast the new upcoming music act... some of these slopes get steeper the older you get, and from some point on, one looks foolish even trying.

I would have loved to take part in the Tour de France (bicycle race) one day, but that is for sure one dream that won't come true.
Do I regret it? Not really.
I've had my share of musical touring and playing live, and in my case that wasn't a big success story but covered my thirst for the road, so, I had to let go of that some years ago.
Do I still dream of going back? No. Performing for an appreciating audience is what I do miss.
I might go and seek after that at some point, knowing that this experience can be had without any need for greater fame or even perfectly developed musical skills, which I do lack. As far as music is concerned, I identify as a musician whos music nobody is asking for. For someone with ambitions on a musical career, that may sound cynical, but I am at peace with that. I can do things with my music, like cheering up my son by banging a beat on our kitchen table. Not glorious or dreamt of, but worthwhile.

So, as far as musical goals are concerned... I guess I'm good with having none that I'd hate to miss.

As for other life-goals... let me dare to state my foolish 45years-on-the-planet wisdom (thanks for making me think about this btw), it goes like this:
Having a "bucket list" of things we want to do, be or achieve is great, as it helps make life decisions and prioritize.
But maybe that is really only beneficial in the first half of ones life, whereas the really wise thing to do later should be to empty that "bucket" by sharing experience and passing on to younger people.
Those who still feel like "oh no, I have not seen/done X or Y" on their deathbeds do not go easily, and those who have filled their achievement buckets without giving back don't go happily.
We all will go, that's for sure.

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Sorry for the loss Joe, and your mindset is probably where a lot of us go when we have time to reflect, especially as we get older.

I like your wording of "an unexpected person who enters your life to make a difference". I'm not sure I've had someone like that, not in what I would consider unexpectedly. Hopefully I'm someone's "unexpected person", that would be an honor.

I do have a musical friend who I have known since like 7th grade. We weren't really like friends initially, more like went to the same school and knew each other. Different crowds you know. It wasn't until high school when we became musical friends. Not sure how he found out I was learning bass or maybe I mentioned it, I don't recall, but he invited me over to jam and eventually be in a band with him. What I recall from those early jams was being submerged into something I was not ready for or had a huge lack of understanding. I immediately knew, from his family dynamics, that this was a family of musicians. He could play all the instruments, but drums, specifically, was his love/passion. He'd invite me over to jam sessions with his dad (a seasoned musician on guitar), his uncle (who played like EVH), himself on drums, and me....me with about 3-4 months of bass lessons under my belt and coming from someone who never really listened to modern rock. I was basically submerged into the deep end and had to figure out how to swim. Being the one in the room with the least knowledge and very lost at times really can do a few things: you can run from it, or just hang in there and try and get everything you can from it, and strive to improve and get better. i chose the latter. it also humbles you when you're in a situation like that. it wasn't done to me on purpose but that was a typical jam session and i felt honored to be a part of it, to learn from it. Over time, my buddy was basically teaching me a lot rhythms and odd times, he loved odd times. He knew I knew nothing about music theory, but would explain time like just adding a little extra here or taking something out there. I was playing 7/8 and 9/8 patterns without even knowing it lol :) Having a drummer teach me things was just cool because we could hammer out a song with just him and I quickly. Maybe he's the unexpected person in my life, someone who've I told him many times, I'm not a musician of any sort w/o his influence and teachings. He's a band director now, which is not surprising, and teaching students year-in and year-out about music. I like to think that maybe I was actually his first student :)

Going back to musical hopes and dreams. I'm not sure I had any deeply rooted goals for music, it sorta found me in a strange way. I always appreciated it, loved playing in bands, but the realist in me always knew the slim chance of actually having a successful career in it, so I always followed education and got my degree in computer science, something else I also loved doing.

A part of me wonders about those "what ifs". That's basically what I spend my time doing these days, thinking about those "what ifs", both musically and just generally. Some "what ifs" I'm glad I avoided. Like the time, in high school, a group of us were planning on going drinking during our lunch break. At the last minute, my close friend and I decided to not participate in that and just go grab lunch instead. Well, all those boys who did participate in that, got in trouble, and were not allowed to walk/graduate with the class that year. That could of been me. Would that have changed my options and path in life? Maybe...who knows. A "what if" avoided.

Perspectives change when you get older. I'd probably be more interested in things that make more of an impact on life or someone's life than something that makes a lot money.

With regards to music and age...I refuse to let the age slow me down. My hands are tired, my eyes are tired, my body is tired, but I'm still gonna give it a run because it keeps me in the right headspace, it can still feed my mind :W

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although to be entirely honest, another "what if" is, what if I met some of the musicians on here at an early stage of my life (in person and playing together), how far would music have taken me?

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